E is for Encourage

Encourage 

1. to inspire with courage, spirit, or confidence
2. to promote, advance, or foster
3. to stimulate (something or someone to do something) by approval or help; support

I am encouraged daily to strive to obtain those things that are of value to me. I have been encouraged to strive beyond my imagination. Educational goals, parenthood, and now my marriage. 

When I found out about my husbands affair my first thought was our marriage is OVER. I was devastated and bewildered. I was pregnant and in my last year of graduate school. It felt like my life was falling apart, In a way it was. But I have sense learned that sometimes old things have to fall apart to encourage the growth of new things.

My marriage was damaged and in trouble way before my husband had his affair. I had an affair over a year before that so looking back... really I am not surprised he had one too. I was instead surprised that the affair had taken the turn it had that lead to his desire to leave our family and in the end me. 

In the past 14 months of our separation an LOT of things have happened. But one of the most exciting things is that I have been encouraged to love despite my pain, grow despite my fear, believe despite what I see, and hold on to what I know has VALUE despite what anyone else my see, think, or say.

I am encouraged to find a better relationship with my self and to know me in ways I never knew before. I am encouraged to love and pray, believe and hold on to the thing that I committed my life to , my husband, our marriage and in extension our family. 

This is NOT easy, I am NO saint, I am angry, frustrated, hurt, disappointed, discouraged and often ready to give up.. But always without fail around the corner comes some form of ENCOURAGEMENT that allows me to stand ONE more day...